Night of the Living Shorties!

What did he know and when did he know it? Uh, what about her? See something wrong in this picture? No? Ok, how about now? You might recall that August 6, 2001 — the date ascribed to the photo — was the same day that the Presidential Daily Briefing was all about some guy named Bin Laden. What is that in her hand? I’m not sure what to make of Ms. Miers, and neither is anybody else. President Bush is expending some effort to defend his decision. A Democrat I normally have the utmost respect for, Harry Reid, supports her nomination. Is this because he honestly thinks she will be alright, is this because of some back-room deal to keep out a real wing-nut, or is this to poison her nomination? How does that work? Well, the conservative base isn’t happy (everyone else is waiting to see what happens next); by supporting her as a liberal Democrat, he makes them less happy. If the Republican base in the Senate then turns against her, he can defeat her while claiming to be the very face of bipartisan support.

Beep beep, beep beep, his car went beep beep beep. Ford and GM had an absolutely abysmal September, and the fun in Detroit is only starting: by a terrible coincidence GM is having a big board meeting today. It is expected to be ugly. Meanwhile, Joe and Jane Average are “Getting strangled at the pump.”

Search Me. Wired brings to our attention some people you won’t find online, the UnGoogleables. There are plenty of people with legitimate reasons they don’t want to be found online. I sure hope Wired used fake names when they put it online….

Ralph Kramden’s Bowling Team. One last word on Katrina. Ok, make that 25 questions about Katrina.

It’s easier to eat cat food than to figure out the prescription drug benefit…. “Most seniors don’t understand the new prescription-drug program being offered under Medicare and don’t plan to sign up for coverage, even after months of salesmanship by the Bush administration.” Yeah. “The program is projected to cost $720 billion over 10 years, according to the latest calculations by the Bush administration. Some members of Congress have suggested delaying the program’s start to help offset the costs of recovery from hurricanes Katrina and Rita, but the White House has rejected those appeals.” Yeah.

Fannie! Finally, my favorite whipping post, Fannie Mae. I’m not the only one who thinks there might be trouble brewing in the world of real estate, and that Fannie might just be the eye of the storm.

Nihon no Keezai Kurasu

Or, “Japanese Economics Class”

Agent Greenspan has spent most of the week talking out of both sides of his mouth. For example: homeowners are in fine shape except for the risky mortgage products, speculative activity, and cashing out of equity. If you want to take a shot at deciphering Greenspeak for yourself, here’s what he actually said today. Currently, Greenspan appears to be telegraphing that there will be a continued rise in interest rates, because there is a continuing risk of inflation. This is of course assuming that the trend of foreign owners of American bonds depressing interest rates does not continue.

Some analysts think this is just awful news. Doesn’t Greenspan know about the lousy consumer confidence numbers? Isn’t he worried about the people who are overextended on mortgages and credit cards? Doesn’t he want to keep interest rates low to stimulate the economy? Has he not noticed the flat stock market? Doesn’t he know that the Administration expects the hurricane damage in the Gulf Coast to sharply impact the economy? Has the old man lost his freaking mind?

Oh yeah, and what does Japan have to do with this?

WARNING! Severe Oversimplification Follows! Modern economic theory says that lowering interest rates stimulates the economy: it makes it cheaper to borrow money, and therefore easier for companies to buy manufacturing equipment — to say nothing of making it easier for Joe and Jane Average to buy things like houses and appliances and cars on credit. Raising interest rates, however, stifles inflation — and with energy prices being what they are, who can blame Greenspan for thinking inflation is a bigger potential problem than slow economic growth.

For some years, Japan has had economic problems. A huge stock bubble in the 80s was followed by a colossal bust in the 90s, and the economy suffered. More accurately, the economy suffered despite slashing interest rates to very low levels, even to zero! If you believe that low interest rates stimulate the economy, you must now be saying something along the lines of “HUH?”

The Japanese economy, while not where it was in the 80s, is now recovering. However, mucking about with the interest rates did not bring this about. It took dealing with underlying problems, in Japan’s case banking/credit reform and consolidation.

It is my theory that beneath certain levels, low interest rates do not stimulate the economy. There are several factors which combine to this result: First, when rates are very low, there is no incentive for lenders to extend credit to individuals and companies. Since the available rate of return is so low, they would rather take the sure thing on government bonds. Housing lending has continued partly because there is a real asset involved, and partly because such loans can be sold to aggregators such as Fannie Mae.

Second, when interest rates are very low, corporate borrowers — who are supposed to be goaded into action by super low rates — are mindful that the Powers That Be feel the economy is lousy. It is a bad idea to incur debts and invest in infrastructure when the economy is lousy. What will the stockholders say? What cash they do have they will sit on until the moment is right. After all, if the economy is lousy, they may well need the cash cushion. As for loans, they will wait for some kind of signal that things are improving — an increase in interest rates, maybe — before calling for cash.

Finally, the third leg of the economic table, Joe and Jane Average do not experience added liquidity. While the banks are more than happy to lend them money for concrete things like houses and cars, the banks won’t lend them cash for things that have a lasting impact on the economy. They can’t get cash to start a business (or to help along their existing business) because it’s too risky — for the bank, that is.

So, Alan? You just keep raising that interest rate, mmkay?

How to Keep a Job

Last week I wasn’t really able to post. I was busy. Specifically, I was busy doing a job I have already hired 2 people to do. This week, I will also spend a lot of time at what should be somebody else’s desk doing what should be somebody else’s job. If you think I find this frustrating, you are correct!

So please allow me, as an employer who has personally created jobs this year, to give you a few handy tips on remaining employed:

Show up! I’m not one of those people who subscribes to the theory that some percent of life is showing up. Rather, showing up is a pre-resquisite. You can’t do a job you aren’t there to do. The job wouldn’t exist if it didn’t need to be done. So show up. Be on time. Don’t cut out early. Reasonable bosses understand that sometimes things like sickness and emergencies and accidents happen. Reasonable bosses also have a finite amount of patience. This is particularly true in small offices where one person represents a double-digit percentage of the workforce.

Just do it! Your job, that is. Another non-shocker. Your number one priority at work — well, after safety — is getting the job done. For each task, Do it once; Do it right. If there’s something you can’t do, figure out why not and what to do about it.

Do what needs to be done. Want to never get a promotion again? Or want to be the first person laid off? Just use these magic words: “That’s not my job.” If the boss asks you to do something, do it. This is of course assuming that you are able to do it and that it’s legal. If a co-worker needs your help, there’s nothing wrong with lending a hand within limits of your time and ability. I am not saying to do his/her job; be reasonable. By extension, you can get a reputation as a go-getter by seeing something that needs to be done and just handling it. You might want to toss in “Oh, by the way, I took care of the XYZ.” Credit where it’s due, you know.

Be willing to solve problems. It’s okay to have problems, but it’s better to fix them. I can’t solve problems I don’t know about, so it’s important to share; however, I always prefer to hear “This is an issue” followed by “and this is what we can do about it.”

Adjust your attitude. I don’t expect boot-kissing, but I won’t tolerate a ‘tude either. There’s no such thing as job security, not even among professional types. Very, very few people have anything approaching “tenure” these days. Chances are you are not one of them.

I hope you find this helpful. Now, I must get back to work until such time as I can find someone else to staff this position.

In closing: A horrifying view of how we are turning poor children into zombies while claiming to educate them. Do we really need a standardized college curriculum? One Thousand Million Dollars missing from Iraq’s defense ministry, that would sure buy a lot of ammo. For that matter that would sure go a long time towards infrastructure. How we’ll all end up paying for Katrina. A follow-up on local disaster planning. And finally, FBI seeks recruits for Porn Squad, since we all know boobs are more dangerous than bombs in the wrong hands.

Here in my Car…

This week there was some economic news: Consumer Sentiment numbers as reported by the University of Michigan dropped sharply, to levels far below what “the experts” anticipated (coincidentally, the Bloomberg version of the story points out a similar drop in President Bush’s approval rating); and retail sales are weak, dragged down by lousy car sales numbers. About the only bright spot on the car sales front is that hybrids are hot, hot, hot. Consumers are caught between light trucks whose values have collapsed and new cars that only sell because of silly incentives. It is no secret why both these things are true, but let me give you the expert take: “Toyota Motor Corp.’s president said he’s ‘worried’ that fuel prices, which surged to records after Hurricane Katrina disrupted supplies in the U.S., may curb worldwide demand for new autos.” It is no coincidence that Toyota offers hybrid cars and trucks.

If the American auto industry really wants to keep selling cars, they are going to have to stop offering the crazy CRAZY crazy deal of the week, and start offering vehicles that people are willing to buy at full price. And unless gas prices fall below $2/gallon (ha, yeah right) that means they need to be both safe and fuel efficient.

They tell you that the popularity of the SUV is evidence that people want these land yachts. If that is so, then drop the incentives! They tell you that bigger vehicles are safer vehicles. The truth is that safe vehicles exist at all size levels; it is a function of good design, not pure mass. Size = safety is one of those over-generalizations, like “All old people like prunes.”

The technology exists to make fuel efficient cars. Thirty years ago, there were efficient cars. They might not have been pretty, and they might not have been peppy, but they were affordable; now we have 30 years of technological advances that can and should be used to make them better. Here’s one fellow whose gadget makes cars both more efficient and less polluting. Somebody, find me a downside to this!

In closing, Senator seeks Wealthy Corpse. Object, poster child for estate tax cuts. Also, CNN takes time to say “if you need a non-standard mortgage to afford that house, maybe you should reconsider.” And finally, two former Governors — one Democrat, one Republican — say our health care system is broken.

New Krakau

I hadn’t planned on posting today, let alone posting on Hurricane relief issues, but I have some Must Read Links

I have seen some reports over the last few days that were first dismissed as anecdotal that Katrina Evacuees are being held in remote locations, surrounded by “security.” This security will not allow them to leave, nor will they allow outsiders in. A caller to the Ed Schultz Show told a similar story about his attempts to get assistance to people in camps located in several locations, including Arizona and Texas. He was turned away, not even allowed to say hello to the evacuees behind barbed wire.

But this is the one thing you must read and tell people about today: American citizens are being held in remote camps, unable to contact the outside world, unable to get their lives together. And she has pictures. We have transcended anecdote and are in the world of eyewitness account. Are they being held against their will? Who can say, since they have no contact with the outside world. They aren’t allowed to go to church; they aren’t even allowed to have a preacher visit them. They aren’t even allowed to have a bowl of cereal. There is every indication that they will be held incommunicado for at least 5 months, unable to get new jobs, unable to pay the bills, unable to process insurance claims, unable to declare bankruptcy before the new rules take effect, unable to get their kids into school, unable to so much as have a cold glass of milk. Some of these people have relatives who would like to take them home. Remember, as Howard Dean said just the other day, “They are not refugees. They are Americans.”

People want to help the evacuees displaced by Hurricane Katrina, but they are not being permitted to do so. Why? These pictures are of course sanitized for your protection, but even the media-safe pictures make it clear that they are in the middle of nowhere. There are no jobs, apartments, schools, cell phone towers, internet connections for miles around. It’s a great place to seek inner peace, but a lousy place to start rebuilding a shattered life.

At least there are potential employers near the Astrodome.

Escape is possible from the Astrodome.

Move to the Right for Sirens and Light

Maybe you’ve seen it on a bumper sticker. Maybe you learned it in Driver’s Ed. “Move to the Right for Sirens and Light” means that when you see an emergency vehicle such as a police car, fire truck, or ambulance with the lights and sirens going, you pull to the side of the road and wait for it to pass. The idea is simple: get out of the way of the people trying to save lives.

I was reminded of this simple rule this morning. Two kids were hit by a car while waiting for the bus, although I didn’t know it until later; all I knew is there were two school busses and lots of emergency equipment on the main road and I was going the other way. More emergency equipment was converging on the scene, so I ended up pulling over a bunch of times. One fellow got impatient and passed me as I followed the law. I can only hope that his karma catches up with him and he reaps what he sows.

What is so hard about get out of the way of people trying to save lives?

They even seem to be having a problem with this very basic concept in New Orleans.

The authorities are too busy preventing photojournalists from showing us what is really going on. Specifically, they don’t want us seeing pictures of the dead. Forgive me for saying that horse has left the barn. Why don’t they want us to see the pictures? Are they afraid to put a human image on this tragedy?

A thousand firefighers showed up. Are they putting out the fires we keep hearing about? Are they triaging the thousands of people who need medical assistance? Are they helping the search and rescue efforts? No, they are passing out fliers.

Medical aid is similarly messed up. Doctors can’t get to people who need them. Doctors who responded to a request for volunteers were met with a web form and and assurance that they might be called in 5-7 days. Pardon me for pointing out that people will die before then.

FEMA is specifically telling first responders not to show up. They have been slow to accept assistance from the business community and even slow to accept assistance from other government agencies. They haven’t even bothered to reply to certain offers of assistance from foreign nations. They responded late despite the fact that a state of emergency was declared even before the storm hit, and have “Turned Away Aid, Rescue Crews, Cut Emergency Communication Lines.”

They are even reprimanding Navy pilots who, having completed their primary mission, stopped to save lives. Foolishly, they thought that was their overriding mission.

The Mayor of New Orleans says there may be 10,000 dead in his city — and remember, that’s just one city in a 3 state area that has been devastated. A mortuary director has been quoted as expecting 40,000 bodies. Since FEMA is actively impeding emergency workers and keeping them from saving lives, expect this number to be conservative.

Move to the Right for Sirens and Light. Get out of the way of people who are trying to save lives.

If this is anything like the way we are handling things in Iraq, no wonder there is an insurgency. “They hate us for our freedoms” indeed.

But why is this being handled so badly? Is it just sheer incompetence? Evacuees are being spread across the country, where they will tell their new neighbors everything that happened. Furthermore, the blame game is already on in Washington. So, political gain is not the goal. Are we looking for an excuse to keep interest rates low? After all this is going to have a negative effect on the economy. In fact, the Congressional Budget Office estimates that 400,000 jobs were lost. Of course the Administration will use this as an excuse when the official job creation numbers come out. You can count on me to call foul if they claim job creation in positive numbers.

Assuming that there is some plan at work, as opposed to mere stupidity, the only logical reason I can think of is that this is a preface to a huge land grab. Evacuees will be forced to sell or allow foreclosure on any land they have in New Orleans, and inasmuch as there is nothing left habitable on it, many of them will be glad to accept pennies on the dollar. The land will be redeveloped in a manner that is wildly profitable, and you can bet the levees will be fortified. Of course this doesn’t leave any room for the evacuees to return, now does it?

I would like to close with a few happy tidbits for you, so here’s Traditional Crafts of Japan, How to make authentic Sourdough bread, Online textbooks, and “What do those characters on the sign at the Chinese Restaurant mean?”

Fubared

Needless to say, New Orleans is a disaster area, and our hearts go out to the people who are still trapped there. If you have the means, donate directly to the Red Cross. Do not mess around with FEMA or Fly-By-Nite Disaster Charity Fund; this is too important. By now I think everyone is aware that there are two primary disasters. No, not “hurricane” and “flood.” Rather, there was a natural disaster and a manmade disaster.

A really big hurricane hitting New Orleans was long considered one of the top most likely disasters that FEMA would have to face. This should — in theory — mean that plans should exist for getting people out and getting aid in. You wouldn’t know it to look at the news. In fact, it almost looks like the Administration did everything in it’s power to make the expected disaster even bigger. In sharp contrast to President Bush’s insistence that nobody could have seen it coming, it is clear that lots of people within the Government knew this was likely and the Administration did worse than nothing about it. The amount of money Bremmer “lost” in Iraq could have paid to prevent this a hundred times over.

Let me say that again: the amount of money that our people simply can’t account for in Iraq could have paid for the levee improvements 100 times, chartered busses to get each and every one of New Orleans’s 500,000 residents out, and purchased a stockpile of bottled water for dessert. How disingenuous to say we couldn’t afford it. If the experts are correct that Katrina might mean a $100 thousand million hit to the economy, how could we afford not to do it?

How nice that Congress is willing to pony up $10.5 thousand million dollars in disaster relief. Of course, there goes the President’s insistence that the budget deficit is lower than previously expected, a trend that will continue as long as that pesky Congress doesn’t go spending money.

This brings me to the manmade disaster. Keep in mind, that like many disasters, the groundwork was laid long before a problem became apparent. In this case, the disaster begins within days of Bush becoming President, when he appointed a FEMA head with no disaster management experience. This was followed by budget cuts, downgrading FEMA from a cabinet level position to a part of Homeland Security, changing FEMA’s focus to terrorism response, and who knows what else.

No, seriously, I wonder what other surprises the Administration has done to us while we’ve been concentrating on big things like civil liberties, vote counting, terrorism, Social Security, and the like. What other looming disasters haven’t we noticed?

Now, to give you an idea of how badly this has been managed, this is Friday. The storm was Monday. Just now, as I have been writing, a military supply convoy has arrived. The Mayor of New Orleans has been understandably upset by the slow and inadequate response. The President himself has said “The results are unacceptable.” Well, Mr. President, who is to blame for that?

Part of the current problem is that many of the National Guardsmen who signed up to protect their state are currently in Iraq. In a strange bit of irony, some of them were scheduled to come home in the next few weeks, but nothing is being done to expedite the matter. Instead, Guardsmen from other regions are being called in to help. And although they gladly will, the fact is that a whole lot of first responders who could have been there in a matter of hours are instead overseas.

But do you know what really steams me? In another Let Them Eat Cake moment, the director of FEMA blames the people trapped in New Orleans for not leaving before the storm, and adds that “Things are going relatively well.” I am flabbergasted! Does he honestly think the people in hospitals could have evacuated? Does he have the faintest clue that anybody who could get out has? The entire point of having the Superdome as an emergency shelter is that there are vast swaths of the population that couldn’t go: no money, no transportation, no place to go. The poverty rate is higher in Louisiana than the national average, and as I pointed out earlier in the week, the national average is one in eight people. There are at least 75,000 refugees, or 15% of the population of the city.

Fifteen percent of the population of a major American city have been left to die. He calls that “going relatively well.”

The one take-away lesson from this disaster is that we cannot count on the Federal Government in time of crisis. This being the case, I urge you to join me today in a campaign of preparedness. Write your state, county, and city officials, urging them to review their disaster plans, and modify them to reflect the fact that FEMA is ineffectual. Ask that they seriously examine plans for evacuation, shelters, stockpiles, and rebuilding. Urge your Governor to recall National Guard troops to defend the state, the fundamental duty they signed up to do. Furthermore, persuade your Governor to make alliances with neighboring states and/or nations to provide reciprocal disaster aid. Do not forget to see to your personal preparedness with things like canned food, bottled water, flashlights, battery powered radios, and of course batteries. Plastic sheeting and duct tape are optional, but they can’t hurt and might be useful. Your state may have additional information about likely threats in your region.

In a twist reminiscent of getting news about Czechoslovakia from the Usenet during their revolution, the best way to find out what is really happening in New Orleans in a spin free manner is blogs. I recommend NOLA, run by the local newspaper, and The Interdictor, run by a fellow who is keeping internet communications going from a secure location somewhere in a downtown high-rise.

Serfin’ USA!

If Paul Krugman is too wordy for you, David Horsey put it into cartoon form: there is a radical disconnect between what “the numbers” say about the economy and what the experience of you and almost everyone you know says about the economy.

Although consumer confidence rose slightly in August, the fact remains that almost as many people think jobs are hard to get as think jobs are plentiful. Gas prices are at record highs and poised to soar higher, yet incomes remain unchanged. This might signal a potential problem even if you don’t think the national debt, deficit spending, the potential housing bubble, consumer debt levels, and the trade imbalance with China are problems.

If, somehow, you can ignore all this, you cannot ignore the fact that poverty has risen again for the 4th straight year. In fact, 1.1 million people are living in poverty this year who weren’t last year. If you’d prefer to think of it this way, 1 out of every 8 Americans live in poverty. It is no longer a third world issue. It is here and now.

A side effect of this poverty level is that more Americans are doing without health insurance. In fact, there are 8 million more uninsured people than there are poor people. Since many poor people are covered by Medicaid, it is clear that we are talking about an even larger pool of people who are either poor or uninsured. This is a problem not only because of lost productivity as people put off small problems or preventative medicine. It is not just a problem because high medical debt often leads to bankruptcy. It also means that doctors and hospitals lose about $45 thousand million in bad debts. Most industries can’t afford to write off billions of dollars; medicine can’t either.

The ostrich economists, however, think that everything is fine. The official unemployment number is low, inflation is under control as long as we don’t pay attention to petrol, and corporate profits are great. The economy really is great if you are close enough to the top.

Everything will be wonderful as long as they can keep the serfs under control. And the serfs are quite nicely controlled by high debt levels, anxiety over health care, fuel costs that limit their movements, and jobs that take up a great deal of their time while barely covering expenses.

In closing: Ten Items Inspired by Science Fiction includes the flip-type cell phone. What a shame they aren’t as cool as in Star Trek. Sorry, you shouldn’t need 2 hands to answer your phone. Also, Could you pass 8th grade math? I got 9 out of 10 because I misread a question. I used only my brain and a small bit of scribbling paper. Of particular note is that the explanation to one answer makes it clear that I should have used a calculator! A calculator? On a math test?

“So, how d’ya like your truck?”

It’s been a little over a year since I purchased a Sunset Orange Pearl 2004 Honda Element.

About once a month someone — usually a complete stranger — asks me “So, how d’ya like your truck?” This is often followed by rather specific questions about such issues as milage and hauling capacity. Honda ought to pay me as many times as I have demonstrated the Element’s features to the curious masses.

There are a lot of things I like about my Element. It’s a small but serious truck, as is evidenced by this fellow taking a world tour in one. The towing capacity is only 1500 pounds, but you can still fit a startling amount of stuff in back. We have even taken the sunroof out and transported a small tree in it. It’s tough enough for light offroading in stock configuration, and there are plenty of aftermarket parts to make it more rugged.

It has the same iVTEC engine as the Honda Civic Si (the little sports coupe), so there is plenty of power. Although a manual is available, I have the automatic transmission. It was decided that we should have at least one vehicle that doesn’t have a stick shift. I get a pretty solid 22 mpg in mixed driving, which definitely isn’t bad for all wheel drive. Heck, it beats some minivans. It handles well in town or on the road, and takes curves without feeling like it is tipping over. Shorter than other Hondas, it parallel parks with ease.

“Polarizing styling” means people either love or hate the way it looks. A lot of people hate the composite body panels, but they are both recyclable and replaceable. I like the eye-grabbing yet dirt hiding color, but I must say there are two new colors this year that look awesome: bright red and charcoal grey. The vehicle sits high, but not so high that a Short Woman such as myself has any trouble climbing into it. I have been telling myself I should get some of those stainless tube running boards, but clearly it is not a priority as I have yet to do so.

Moving inside, I definitely think the Element has a nicer interior than the CR-V. Granted, the CR-V seats 5 and is 10 inches longer than the Element, but the Element is just a more practical and appealing vehicle. Every interior surface can be cleaned by sweeping or wiping it off. Every interior surface is water resistant. This should be instant appeal for anyone with kids, dogs, or outdoor/wet hobbies. Each seat has a cup-holder — and really who needs more than one? — that will easily accommodate a variety of containers ranging from a juice-box or can of Red Bull up to a fast food large drink. The seats and seatbelts are comfortable and fully adjustable; adjustable belt points are an absolute necessity for any person under 5’2″. The back seats have more than adequate room for an adult, making them absolutely luxurious for smaller passengers.

One of the best things about the Element is storage, storage, storage! There’s a little ledge for your garage remote and gas receipts. There’s another little ledge over on the passenger side for some mints, your iPod (handy stereo input right there), your cell phone charger (the outlet is right next to the stereo input), and other important stuff. There’s a compartment overhead for a CD case or sunglasses. There’s a door compartment on all 4 doors for things like maps and windshield shades. There’s a spot near the front seat cup-holders for small snacks or maybe sunscreen. There’s room on the backs of the seats for, uh, i don’t know, stuff. There’s pockets in the rear compartment for the bag you can put the sunroof glass into, a tarp, bungies, a couple plastic bags… you get the picture. The bottom of the cargo compartment can be made into a picnic table.

Speaking of cargo, there’s hooks in the cargo area where you can make sure your cargo stays put! It’s a quirk of mine, but I hate when the groceries circumnavigate the trunk on the way home. If you end up with a lot of stuff, each rear seat easily folds up to give you more cargo room, and protect the windows while you’re at it. It is always amusing to watch some Good-Ol-Boy go from “Ha! she’s never going to get all that stuff into that little itty bitty truck!” to “Wow, that’s amazing.” If you have a really big hauling job, the seats can be taken out altogether — no tools required — and stored until you are done.

This is also a vehicle with a sense of community. There are Element owners clubs all over the country. It is not unusual for Element drivers to wave at one another. Some may scope out another’s modifications. At the very least, you can almost always get a smile out of another Element driver at a stop light.

As many things as I love about my Element, there are a few things I don’t like. For example, the large exterior rear view mirror on the driver’s side creates a blind spot. This may partly be a function of how far forward the seat is, in my case. I wish I had a small vanity mirror on the back of the sun-visor. And occasionally, I wish I could seat five.

Nevertheless, if someone asks how I like my truck — and they never say car, although they sometimes say “rig” — I will tell them I love it. And as long as I am not in too big a hurry, I will answer a question or two.

No Espresso at this CAFE

It would have been easy to miss this story if you rely on national news sources. Although the Associated Press wrote the story, it has mostly been covered by local news people despite the fact that it will impact the millions of people who will buy light trucks in the next decade. After resisting pressure on the issue for years, the Bush Administration is considering tightening fuel economy requirements on most light trucks.

This might be a politically motivated move designed to placate voters before the 2006 elections, but if so it’s too little far too late; the standards in question won’t begin to phase in until 2008.

Environmentalists, scientists, economists, and people concerned with national security have been pushing for improved CAFE standards for years now, and have yet to make much headway with the Bush Administration. Why the Flip-Flop?

It seems unlikely that there is genuine concern over the fact that record high gas prices are cutting profits at some retailers, inasmuch as the Wal-Mart customer who can’t afford gas to drive to Wal-Mart also can’t afford a new truck. Gas prices are changing the way average Americans do things, but this proposed change won’t make things better for another 5 years, if then.

I predict that — if this change to the CAFE standards ever happens as planned — it will be smoke and mirrors. Please note that the new standard would break “light trucks” into 6 classes based on size and weight. Sure, a 2010 minivan should theoretically get better milage than a 2001 minivan, but it will no longer be compared to pickup trucks or SUVs. This complicated standard opens the door for auto manufacturers to use all sorts of engineering chicanery to manipulate vehicles into different classes of light truck. Don’t forget, each of the articles describing the change include a sentence like this one: “But the largest SUVs, such as the Hummer H2, and cars would not be affected by the plan.” The “light truck” category is already very complicated. It can be difficult to figure out what qualifies and what doesn’t. This should actually be a vital concern inasmuch as “light trucks” in addition to having different fuel economy standards, have different safety standards than passenger cars.

The plans don’t include better fuel economy, just more categories that make it seem like there is better fuel economy.

I propose radically simplifying the system. Let’s classify vehicles based on the number of passengers they are designed to safely transport. Three seats and under would be called “work vehicles.” This would include panel vans and pickup trucks, and have lower fuel efficiency requirements. Yes, this category would also include two-seater sports cars, but that’s alright; not only would this mean these cars could be more powerful, a higher milage sports car could be added to the fleet to improve average fleet economy. Anything with four to seven seats would be called a “passenger car” and be held to the highest fuel efficiency standards and strict safety standards, as this would represent the vast majority of vehicles on the road. Everything from the Hyundai Accent to the Chevy Tahoe would fall into this category. Even more strict safety standards, but lower fuel efficiency standards, would apply to vehicles that seat eight or more people, a category I would like to call “passenger buses.” I feel this label accurately describes the practical uses of such vehicles.

In closing, I have two items of concern. First, Pat Robertson advocates assassinating the democratically elected President of Venezuela, Hugo Chavez. Why? Because “he’s going to make that a launching pad for communist infiltration and Muslim extremism” and anyway, “It’s a whole lot cheaper than starting a war … and I don’t think any oil shipments will stop.” I don’t know what’s more startling: that Robertson has never heard the phrase “godless communists;” that he thinks he has the authority to call what is in essence a fatwa; that he admits that oil is a huge part of the issue; or that he still claims to follow a God who said stuff like “Thou shalt not kill” and “Love your enemies… and pray for them.” My second item of concern, “The Government” says Look out! Vagrants might really be terraists in disguise. The fact that no single department is claiming to have issued this warning, but rather it is “based on a State Department report” is very interesting. This sounds suspiciously like an excuse that will allow mass roundups of the homeless.