Tag: exercise nutrition

To the Lady in Workout Clothes ahead of me at the Grocery Store

Hey dear, let me tell you why you’re never going to lose that 10 to 20 pounds around your hips and waist and why your hubby is never going to lose the gut unless you change your ways.

I’m not going to put all the blame on the expensive whole wheat crap that you think is good for you, even though you should probably only eat half that at most, and even though there is a case to be made for that being your biggest problem. Many experts think that’s good stuff, but you still should put some of it back on the shelf.

I’m not going to be too hard on you for the gallon of frozen yogurt. Again, you think you’re doing the right diet thing, even though it’s still got far too much sugar in it to be truly healthy. Maybe you only eat a tablespoon a day? Maybe I wasn’t close enough to see that it was one of those fat-free or sugar-free chemistry sets masquerading as real food?

I’m not going to put all the blame on the plentiful sports drinks in your cart, even though there is simply no way you are working out hard enough for them to be beneficial to you. Have you ever looked at the nutrition panel? It’s probably replenishing every calorie you “worked” off, and many of those drinks contain corn syrup. If you seriously worked out hard enough for these to be a good idea, you would never dream of wearing your disgusting sweaty workout clothes to a grocery store — even fresh out of the wash!

I am going to rag on you just a little bit for the 3 boxes of different kinds of crackers. For pity sake, if you want to eat something that goes crunch, try an apple or a carrot! You might get some vitamins out of the deal.

I am going to rag on you just a little bit for the fact that the only protein I saw in your cart was a pound of ground beef. Come on, that’s going to last a week? If you don’t eat some protein, your body is just going to steal it from your muscles. In case you didn’t know, muscle is what keeps you from looking like a complete blob.

But the one thing that I think is your biggest problem was the stack of 6 frozen pizzas. That proves that you only give the faintest lip service to eating healthy: pizza is neither low carb nor low fat. Ever. Just, please, tell me that’s not a one week supply. Lie to me if you must. You want a pizza? Learn to make that stuff from scratch. I can guarantee you’ll eat less of it because it’s harder than stuffing that frozen crap in a hot oven, it will be better tasting because you’ll use better ingredients, and healthier. Why healthier? You’ll actually burn some calories kneeding the dough, shaping it, and putting quality stuff on top!

Want to make that gut vanish? Try eating real, minimally processed food. Sure, you’ll have to spend more than 3 minutes preparing it, but you and your husband will both be better off.

I’d like to say at least your dog eats well, but you didn’t buy any dog food.

In Closing: would you like to play a game?; playing it safe; poverty tax; ever wonder what the numbers mean?; duh; travel tips; “let’s just take these laptops with no anti-virus to a hacker’s conference! What could possibly go wrong???”; parks; make “the Pill” OTC, prevent abortions; we don’t need “administrators” with no common sense having any authority over children, ever, for any reason.

Food Fight

Maybe you heard the story of a blogger who was threatened with jail time for blogging about his experience in a non-mainstream diet called “Paleo” or “Primal” eating. Never mind for just a moment that his diet doesn’t conform to what The Experts think it should. That wasn’t the issue at all: the issue and his “crime” is that he was giving dietary “advice.”

That’s exactly what the American Dietetic Association is trying to make illegal across the nation: giving “advice” without having their name-branded license. Don’t believe me? Go  on to page 3 where you’ll learn about a lady with a freakin Masters Degree in Human Nutrition who was told by her state to shut down her practice of, well, nutrition. Now, if she’s not an expert, I’m really not sure who would be!

So, could I run afoul of these laws by pointing out that veggies are good for you?

What if I link this article on how sugar may be bad for you? Never mind that too much sugar is absolutely bad for you, that article was written by journalists, not dietitians or nutritionists.

How about if I link to this infographic about nutrition for athletes and those who wish to get into shape?

This is foolishness and must be stopped.

In Closing: the case that will show “stand your ground” laws have gone overboard involves a grade school teacher who was killed because the stereo was a little loud; Depak Desai has some ‘splainin to to to the bankruptcy court; funny how you can be a loose cannon when you aren’t running for anything; he admits it; anybody surprised??; Click and Clack retiring; electric race car going up the mountain; I thought impersonating a police officer was a crime?; yeah right; and have a great weekend.

A City of Tradition

Why yes, Chicago is a city of tradition. They turn the river green for St. Patrick’s day — and I don’t mean for organic fishing. They have arcane fire codes because of an ancient fire which destroyed most of the city (and freed up the coastal areas for redevelopment as parkland). Foods like pizza and hot dogs have their own Chicago traditions. There’s so much tradition that according to legend, the dead vote.

And there’s also a fine tradition of Chicago’s police department pre-acting and over-reacting.

Sure, they are expecting protests of the NATO summit. Sure, abandoned luggage has to be investigated these days instead of being taken to the lost and found. And sure, there are lots of targets, although I fail to see what bombing the mayor’s place would have proved (and even if it would have accomplished something, any idiot terrorist should have expected more security this week than next week).

Was it really necessary to arrest people for something that they might have been thinking about doing? How do you prove you weren’t thinking something? And really, to describe a Malotov as a “primitive bomb” means that all those IEDs in Iraq are sophisticated devices. Anybody with gasoline, an empty glass bottle, and an old rag can make one. Of course, the “bomb making” equipment may well turn out to be “beer making” equipment. I understand the confusion; both start with B.

And if they were going to take 30 hours to come up with a warrant, couldn’t they at least have found a judge to sign the damn thing? Were these unarmed people really so dangerous they had to be shackled to a bench for 18 hours? Really? Did they get their phone call? Did they have to dial with their noses?

All snark aside, CPD could learn a lot from Vegas Casino security.

In closing: Hawaii tells Arizona where to get off; is a short middle-aged white guy in a hoodie a thug too?; he knew what the job paid when he spent millions of dollars trying to get it; bananas > Gatorade; apparently some people think preventing rape of prisoners is a luxury; 44% of Facebook users never click on ads.