The First Husband: Not Exactly a Roman Holiday

Today’s BlogHer Book Club selection is The First Husband by Laura Dave. Although I am being compensated for this review, the opinions expressed are my own. Join the discussion over at BlogHer!

One fine day, travel columnist Annie Adams’s live in boyfriend of 5 years arrives home from a business trip and announces that he’s leaving her. Some quack therapist says he needs time on his own — and by the way he wants to see what happens with a high school crush. Oh, and one last thing, he’s taking their dog.

Who wouldn’t be devastated? A couple weeks later, she finally tries to put her life back together. Almost immediately, Annie meets someone new, exciting, totally different. Just a few months later she’s married to her new love and moving cross country to his hometown.

What could possibly go wrong?

The First Husband is a novel about self-discovery. Obviously, lots of things go wrong, from bizarre situations with the in-laws and run-ins with exes to job troubles. But just as obviously, Annie becomes a much better person in the process; one who knows what she wants and knows that she’s already got a lot of it.

So to use a cliche straight out of the book: What’s the best and worst thing about The First Husband? The worst thing is Annie blaming her troubles on watching Roman Holiday. The best thing: a little spoiler for you, she did get her dog back.

In Closing: No, HFCS is not “corn sugar“; a picture says a thousand words about maternity leave; SEC fail; and misuse of authority.

Pair of Docs

Who knew doctors were good at cooking Chinese food! You would think they’d practice medicine instead. Free blood pressure check and egg rolls with purchase of family dinner?

Also, I’ve been trying to figure out if it’s Club Ash Pa, Lash Spa, or Cash Spa for 6 months now.

In Closing: a fun game you can play at home; Darwin Award nominee; what??caffeine; don’t keep it simple; wages and rents; and, um, Unicorners. Stay tuned for a book review tomorrow to round out my own month of everyday blogging (sometimes over at my pro site). Nope, not gonna call it NuPaBluGagEvQ or whatever the cutesy name for “blog every day month” is.

Detail Work

Ok, let me start by saying that I’m as outraged as anybody that we have JUDGES in this country that can’t seem to use good JUDGEment.

The story of the 17 year old honor student jailed overnight for truancy has made the rounds. It’s very sympathetic. She works a full time job and a part time job to support her siblings and still manages to pull down good grades. The judge felt he had to make an example out of her. Wow, what a heartless judge, right?

Some people think this is a travesty because “how is putting her in jail going to put her in school.”  Some say it’s a travesty just because the situation is ludicrous — after all she’s an honor student, not some gang-banger. Some say it’s a travesty because she’s old enough to drop out of school with her parents‘ written consent.

And, you see, that’s the real problem that everybody seems to have missed, including the judge. Her parents are gone. Split up, one no longer even in the state and the other only occasionally around, not really in her life. She shouldn’t have to work 2 jobs to support her siblings and herself.  No 17 year old should have to do that. When the judge realized that she was a minor and her parents were not there, he should have adjourned to call Child Protective Services. You know, the government agency that protects children. She and the younger sister should be with a foster family today, she should be able to at the very least quit one of her jobs, and her truancy problems should be over.

Who is the adult here? Sadly, the 17 year old truant who can’t even sign a binding legal document is.

In Closing: consumer lack of confidence; easy ways to end up in indefinite detention; and a list of keywords that the Department of Homeland Security is watching for. If this list is correct, the DHS must spend a lot of time looking for secret messages in newspapers and blogs.

Modern Patriotism

Nothing says “I love my country” and “support our troops” like a great t-shirt. This one makes sense, mostly. What could be more American than Rock and Roll?

Then again, maybe you prefer patriotic stars-and-stripes dolphins on a lavender background. Maybe they are helping our Navy!

Surely, nothing represents remembering our fallen troops like a kitten sitting in a flag-bordered red-white-and-blue flowerbed watching fireworks! How A-MEOW-ican!

Don’t dare tell Sigfried and Roy that white tigers can’t be patriotic Americans too. Roar!

And finally, patriotism is not just for American cats. Japanese cats can love America too (offer not valid during World War 2). Heck, Hello Kitty loves America so much, you can co-ordinate patriotic Hello Kitty shorts with your patriotic Hello Kitty t-shirt.

I think I need some nice, American bourbon.

In Closing: TED; poor deliberately made poorer; space for profit; Robert Reich; bloody Romans Government; more Mitt on education; should have expected this; and castles.

Enter the Dragon

It’s been a long road since 2004, when Space Ship One made its second, prize-winning voyage. Today, astronauts from the International Space Station got to tour the world’s first successful private spacecraft, the Dragon. It’s the first time a non-government vessel has docked with the ISS, and it brought lots of non-essential supplies. Why non-essential? Because nobody was 100% sure the craft would make it.

Dragon also brought James Doohan’s ashes.

This excerpt from the AP confused me, however:

The space station has been relying on Russian, Japanese and European cargo ships for supplies ever since the shuttles retired. None of those, however, can bring anything of value back; they’re simply loaded with trash and burn up in the atmosphere.

By contrast, the Dragon is designed to safely re-enter the atmosphere, parachuting into the ocean like the Mercury, Gemini and Apollo capsules did back in the 1960s. Assuming all goes well Friday, the space station’s six-man crew will release the Dragon next Thursday after filling it with science experiments and equipment.

What? How are we getting astronauts and cosmonauts down from the ISS then? Surely that’s not a one-way trip!

It’s tempting to talk about how this is a great example of private industry doing a job that government used to do. However, Dragon did take off from Cape Canaveral, a big federal government run “space station” as opposed to the (unfinished, mostly state taxpayer funded) Spaceport America in New Mexico.

There are private airports; will there ever be private spaceports?

In Closing: Income inequality in the Roman Empire; 50 years of fire; death by foreclosure (I still don’t know how this could possibly happen — nobody trashed out or did inspections??); and have a great, safe Memorial Day Weekend.

Happy Towel Day

Yes, it’s Towel Day once again. Don’t forget your towel. And most importantly DON’T PANIC.

In Closing: R-Money proposes using my tax dollars to send rich kids to private school help poor and middle class families still not afford private schools; would it have been so hard for some adult, any adult to say “We treat others with respect around here?? (I don’t even know what to say); 550 cats and no husband; there’s an app for that; oops; Detroit; achievements include 8 life sentences; mass hysteria; and Today I Learned there is a patron saint of the Internet.

Life with Diabetes

Sure, Paula. Let’s discuss “Life with Diabetes.” How about we start by talking about the importance of laying off the “Fresh Berry Cakes”? Even the American Diabetes Association says “sweet treats” are for “special occasions.” I get the impression that around the Deen household, Tuesday counts as a special occasion. The Mayo Clinic  suggests that a diabetic’s carbohydrates should come from “fruits, vegetables, whole grains, legumes (beans, peas and lentils) and low-fat dairy products.” I don’t see “cake” anywhere on that list. Add to that the latest research showing that fatty acids can “impair insulin action and lead to abnormally high blood sugar.” So yeah, the berries are fine, in moderation. The cake, not so much.

I’m not a doctor, and I’m not a nutritionist, but no research has ever found that large amounts of simple sugars are good for diabetics. If you have diabetes, pre-diabetes, metabolic syndrome, or are overweight (and therefore at risk of all the above), you should really talk to your doctor instead of making Paula Deen recipes.

Crap like this is why diabetics have complications. “Carb-smart” my tuchus.

In Closing: Hmm, maybe the Principal having a hissy fit in front of cameras over an event that the mayor thought was a great thing was a bad idea; “excuse me, before I tase you do you have any underlying health conditions or drugs in your system?”; turns police work into a freaking video game (right, totally not gonna abuse that!); Apple and the iPhone; Oof, it is that time of year; and Bill Clinton chilling out with porn stars.

Good News on the Economy

Seriously, I’m coming up on 9 years of writing here, and this is the first time I’ve been able to write those words without meaning it sarcastically.

First, unemployment is down to 8.1% (locally, down to 12.4%). That’s still too high, and it still doesn’t account for people who have given up on finding a job and people who have settled for part time work. And the economy still isn’t quite up to making enough jobs for people new to the workforce, and new grads are still going to have a crappy time out there. However, not that long ago we were looking at almost 10%.

Second, there are signs of life in American manufacturing. Auto plants are working at capacity, and may have to actually hire an additional shift of workers — which is much less expensive than building a new plant and then having it sit idle 16 hours a day. Some industries that decided it was cheaper to make it overseas and ship it here are thinking twice. Senior executives are cautiously optimistic, and 40% report moving operations to the United States.

Finally, home prices are starting to inch up. Granted, this is at least in part because of reduced supply (and at least in part because prices got stupid-low on a per-square-foot basis in some places).

So there you have it. People are getting jobs and buying stuff. Some manufacturers are running out of the ability to make more stuff — so they may have to build places and hire people to make even more stuff. Maybe soon the Fed can raise interest rates from the supposedly “stimulating” levels they are today, and in turn banks will be able to make a reasonable profit lending money without making up fees or outright committing fraud.

In Closing: Who could have guessed that Citizens United could open the door to ordinary people taking over elections?; never forget Romney’s dog; Tokyo Sky Tree now open; too useful to be real; cheap and free ebooks; yet one more reason I’m against school vouchers; FISA; $27,000??; and the Vatican gets outraged when nuns actually act on What Would Jesus Do.

 

Music Monday: Computer Generated?

I’ve become convinced that the Black Eyed Peas are actually performing songs written by a sure-fire no-fail hit writing computer algorithm. How else do you get lines like “Beats so big I’m steppin’ on leprechauns”? People in the place, give it up:

Of course, I prefer the Bad Lip Reading version:

Now, at some point I think the algorithm got “borrowed” by LMFAO:

There. Doesn’t that explain a lot?

In Closing: Scam; is there some reason they couldn’t have raided the store in daytime?; Stereotypes; not normally something one does alone; and that’s why they have to disenfranchise as many people as possible; hope he’s right; look, you silly man, the reason it needs to be better regulated is that if the shareholders and owners lose everything, the FDIC — that is the taxpayers — are on the hook.